Saturday, November 27, 2010


There is a time for everything. One good friend used to tell me that if you laugh that much, you will cry that much. If you enjoy that much, you will suffer that much. I always wonder how much of what he said is true. But I do believe that there is a time for everything.

There is a time for laughter and there is a time for sorrow. There is a time to be a hero and there is a time to be a coward. There is a time for hate and there is a time for love. There is a time for success and there is a time for failure. There is a time to live and there is a time to die.

You must always remember that all things, good or bad, must pass.

When you take a walk in the evening after the rain, you will see the freshness of the grass you walk on. Look at the houses along the street, they have been washed clean. You will realise  that the sun will soon be setting and the colour of the sky will be beautiful. Too beautiful for any artist to paint, too beautiful for any camera to capture. This is your life, too beautiful for words to describe. This is the time to feel that you and nature are one. The beauty you see around you is the beauty in you.

As you are slowly walking along the street, up in the dark space above the sky, the planets and stars are revolving by themselves and also revolving round the sun. How orderly they spin on their own, hardly colliding into one another. This is the order of nature. And you are a part of this order. So do not make a mess of your life by defying this order.

Feel the evening wind on your face. This wind comes from afar. It travels all the way from the distant hills, drifts through the town and now touches your face. You are the reason the wind is blowing.

Look at the children playing in the field. See how happy they are. They know no worries and they think their play is never ending, Look at your own happiness, let it be never ending,

But evening always reminds us that something is about to end. All the fun of the weekend ends when Sunday evening comes. All the long holidays in the sun ends when Sunday evening comes. Suddenly you feel sad that all things must pass. When the night finally comes, don't feel sad. Hold on to your good memories and you will  always feel the warmth of the sun in your heart.

Good friends will come and they will go. Sooner or later you will end up alone. When you are alone in your bed, where do you go.

 Use your mind and you can travel far. Across the seas to distant lands you have never been before. Look at the great cathedrals of Spain. Walk in the streets of London. Play with the poor children of Naples. Climb the hills of Peru. Party all night in Brazil. Feel the rain in Africa. Visit the sacred temples of India. Taste the ice cream of Italy.  Feel the cold mid-winter of St. Petersburg.Go where you want to, no one can stop you.
So when evening comes, welcome the night. Get ready for an adventure of your lifetime!

Friday, November 19, 2010


Something that Julie said, I just couldn't get it off my head. She said her boyfriend has left her for another girl. She didn't know that girl but she met her once. Julie said she couldn't understand why he fell for her. This girl wasn't even pretty. I said maybe its the way that she treated him.

Julie said she would give anything to have him back. All their past had been happiness. Meeting and dating everyday and night. Her special would say the sweetest things and made promises that he would always be by her side. They had a great time together for almost ten months. That went by so fast that it seemed like it was only ten minutes.

Once they were by the beach watching the sunset. He said he loved to see her long flowing hair dancing in the breeze. And the rays of the sun on her face was worth all the gold in the world. He said he loved everything about her, the way she walked on the sand and the smile on her face. Julie said she wouldn't believe these good times would end. He said he would love her till the seas ran dry.

He said many many things to Julie. All were praises for her. One Sunday afternoon Julie accidentally cut her forefinger while she was peeling an apple with a knife. He ran towards her and held her in his arms and cried. He said that was like a cut into his heart.

Whenever they went out, he would be very jealous if Julie looked at other boys or talked about her casual boyfriends. There were numerous times that he took her mobile and screened through her messages. Another time Julie discovered that he had hacked into her facebook profile and erased all her photos with her friends. Julie didn't mind that, as that would gain his trust in her, she said.

Julie said they never quarreled. Whenever she lost her temper over something, he would be the one to give in. He told her he couldn't bear to see her unhappy or angry.

One day while Julie's birthday was drawing near, she suggested to him that she would like it to be celebrated  in a restaurant together with her parents. He neither said yes or no. Julie took it for granted that he agreed that that would be the arrangement. On the night of her birthday, he didn't turn up. She kept calling him but her calls were never answered. Since that day, Julie never heard from him.

On a Friday evening, three weeks later, Julie saw him with another girl in his hand. He was so busy talking to this girl that he didn't even notice Julie, as he walked past her. Julie ran home and cried.

Yesterday, Julie said that she would still forgive him if he would only come back to her.

Sunday, November 14, 2010


I met a small man with a big car
I asked him 'Hey Mister, are you a star?'
He said 'No, I just work in a bar'
I could not believe it
How could he afford such a car?
He said 'Do not believe too much what you see
There is a story behind every face.
Like when you listen to the radio,
You cannot see what is taking place.
No one knows I am a slave,
I used up every sen that I saved
I work double hard to pay for the car
Even borrowed from whoever came to the bar,
To pay for the car.

I met a pretty girl at a store the other day
I asked her 'Why is everybody coming this way?'
She said 'This is an international boutique and now its in town
Everyone is dying to have a look around.'
I looked at the prices, I could hardly believe
The store was robbing us like thieves
A large crowd gathered outside rushing to get in
Some were ordinary like you and me
While others acted like they were beauty queens
Like flocks of sheep
they rushed to the counter to pay
Later tonight they would post it on their blog to display
Whatever they bought they thought was cool
They also wanted the world to know that too
But really, who were the actual fools?

Thursday, November 11, 2010


Life is a waiting game. Everybody waits for nice things to happen. When will the good apples fall on my side of the fence?' I heard this line somewhere before but I couldn't recall from where or when. When will prince charming come on a white horse?

Well, I guess no one can answer this question except yourself.  One thing for sure is that you have to wait.

So much of our time is spent in waiting. Waiting for our exam results. Waiting for an interview. Waiting for the plane. Waiting for someone. Waiting to be served. Waiting for our pay. Waiting for opportunities. Waiting to get well. Waiting can be so frustrating if it is in vain. Like waiting for someone who never turns up. Waiting for a special that never calls.

If you are lonely and are waiting for someone to love, do not feel so hopeless.For everyone has a lucky star. Look for yours! Someone tells me that is rubbish. I do not agree. If you are patient enough and not let disappointments let you down, you will eventually see your lucky star. Believe is the key. So, have faith!

I wanna ask a question which quite many people cannot really answer.Why are there so many religions in the world and so many believers?

The simple answer is Faith. Because a person has faith in what he believes in. A person who has faith doesn't have to see God physically to believe that he exists.

Faith is not what you can see. Faith is the belief in what you cannot see. I do not have to see to believe there is a God. And I do not have to see to know that God can do miracles.It is what that I cannot see that makes my belief stronger.I don't wanna sound like I'm John Lennon or the Dalai Lama but that is true!

A person who has faith in her husband doesn't have to spy on him all the time,right?. So for those who hasn't found anyone to love, don't worry, have faith. And soon enough, you will find someone waiting for you. Fate always comes so unexpectedly.

I have to tell you this, don't ever let waiting get you down. I tell you a secret, just turn all your waiting into 'getting' and you will you see how easy good things really come to you! Instead of saying 'waiting for a job' say 'getting a job'. Also say things like 'getting an opportunity, getting someone to love me, getting well etc.etc
 Then, you will surely get what you want this time!

Saturday, November 6, 2010


Nobody likes to go to the hospital. I have been running around lately to and from that place daily. A person whom I love very much is lying in a hospital bed. She is getting old and her heart is weak. Though her health is deteriorating , she remains strong as ever. I can see the pain that she is suffering. It tells in her eyes. Still, she is not sheding a tear, that shows how strong she is.

Although dying is near at hand, one must remember that death is natural. It can come to anybody, anytime. So see life as a circle, old ones must die and give way so that younger ones may live. We must not be so sad. But being a visitor to the hospital makes you miserable because you can see so many sad faces around you. This is not a place to be happy. I wish I could  go somewhere else.

The reason we are sad when someone close to us dies is because we would miss that person. See it differently, isn't it great for that person to leave if living longer causes so much pain. I always dream of my father. He died quite a number of years ago. Each time he appears in my dream, he looks so happy and so full of life. His whole personality glows and he looks clean and pure. Sometimes I wonder if he has become an angel but I couldn't see any wings on him.

There is one time I dreamt I was walking down a very busy and crowded street. Something like Oxford Street in London. There were people everywhere, rushing about here and there. Suddenly I noticed  that a man walking not far in front of me was my father. He had his back facing me and I was behind him. I called out to him. He didn't turn back to look but instead walked faster away from me. I kept calling louder and louder to him, he walked faster and faster. Soon I found myself running after him. Eventually he disappeared in the crowd. I woke up in bed with my voice still calling.

In a way, dreams are quite fascinating. I enjoy dreaming. Some of my dreams do come true. Well, I guess I would write about that another time if the mood is right.

Wednesday, November 3, 2010


Whatever happened to the bass player? His name is Victor. Managed to get him on the phone last week. Victor agreed to meet me at Mcdonalds in Subang Parade. Well, on the day we met Victor came alone in his office attire. Just finished work, I supposed. I ordered a Big Mac Macvalue meal for him while I myself had a chicken burger and coffee.

Hi, Victor, I think its been 4 years we haven't seen each other, right? So, how's life been?

Well, you know I am selling life insurance now, can I draw up a plan for you?

No jokes please. I wanna meet you because I am writing a blog about you guys, Sebastian, Jason and yourself of 'The Careless Picnickers'. I hope you can obliged me to some of your opinions.

Are you serious, who would want to know about that group? They are a bunch of losers. You are crazy. We didn't even have one fan when the band existed. Anyway, what do you want me to tell you

You are right, you didn't have any fans, not even one. But tonight as you sleep, there may be one or maybe more, people the world over, will get to know who you are.

You mean I'll be famous. I'm so flattered!

In a way, yes. The main reason I wanna write about you guys is that you are all dedicated musicians. Talented and knowledgeable. Such attributes would motivate the many other local bands around. Do you still play?

No, I have a girlfriend now and I'm spending most of my time courting her.

If there ever is an opportunity to play again, would you consider?

Well, I guess I would. I'm sure my special will understand. As you know, music is a part of my life. I used to spend so much of what I earned in buying music CDs, I am doing it still. So, if someone comes along and says he need a bass player, I will put up my hand.

Did you meet up with Sebastian?

Yes, poor Sebastian, I recently just visited him. He is still the same, sitting there in his wheelchair like a vegetable. His sister says she often plays the CDs that Sebastian used to like, for him to listen to see if they will make him happier. He just shows no response.

How about Jason, any news about him?

Yes, I met him once about a year ago. He is attached to a stock broking firm. He says he will be getting a promotion soon. Only then, he says he will think of buying a new car.

Did you know that Jason once had a crush on me?

No, I didn't know. Anywhere I wouldn't be surprised if he did. Jason has a kind of power over girls. Most of them will stick to him and give in to what he wants.

I guess that's why he hated me cos I didn't give in to his demands. Do you know if he is still playing the lead guitar?

He did mention to me he is playing for a thrash group now. I think its called ' The Fate of Neptune'. You know, they play to the likes of 'Carcass', 'Morbid Angels' and 'Cannibal Corpse'.

What about the singer of 'The Careless Picnickers'?

You mean, Steven? I heard that he is studying Law in the London School of  Economics and Political Science in the University of London. We used to hate him because he wanted to move the band into playing rock. You know we are all for indie music, one day we discovered he had a whole book consisting of songs like 'Sweet Child of Mine' by Guns N' Roses, 'Hell Bells' by AC/DC, 'Livin' on a Prayer' by Bon Jovi and etc. We got real furious.

If 'The Careless Picnickers' are still playing, would you think they will be famous?

I cannot say though, I know we have the talents  to go far but that will also gonna count on luck too.

Thanks a lot, Victor, for sharing so much.

You are welcome anytime, thanks for the meal.

My pleasure. Finish your french fries, Victor.

Monday, November 1, 2010


I have to say something about Jason. He is the lead guitar player of The Careless Picnickers (again! Yes this dead group again). You know, everything that dies may one day comes back. I heard someone said that before, I guess it must be Bruce Springsteen, he sang that line in 'Atlantic City' taken off his album 'Nebraska'. Now, anyone of you who has just lately been retrenched or laid off by your boss, don't ever touch that CD. It will make you more depressed. However, if you suffer from insomnia, that is the cure! Warning though, it is a guy's album, most girls won't listen to it unless they can't sleep, ok?

What about Jason? He is quite good looking. On first impression, there is nothing you wouldn't like about him. One thing annoying is that he keeps saying the same thing over and over. He thinks its funny. Ever since he watched the movie 'Bend it like Beckham', each time he picks up his guitar, he would go ' Play it like Sambora'(Bon Jovi)' or 'Play it like Johnny Marr(The Smiths)' or 'Play it like Kirk Hemmett (Metallica)' or 'Play it like Kurt Cobain(Nirvana)' or 'Play it like Richie Blackmore(Deep Purple)' or 'Play it like Jeff Young(Megadeth)' or 'Play it like Mark Knopfler(Dire Straits)' or 'Play it like Thompson(The Cure)' or "Play it like Noel Gallagher(Oasis) and on and on....and I would just tell him 'Why don't you just play it like yourself?' He says he can't.

Another thing about Jason is that he is boastful. He thinks he knows more about the guitar than anyone else But I have to agree, he can play 'Sultans of Swing' (Dire Straits) damn well! Jason says it  is a great song to practise your fingers with, as it utilises the entire neck of the guitar. I always like to hear him him play the lead solo bit of 'Don't look back in anger' (Oasis). He can play it note for note and the rest of the guys would bow at his feet as though he is Noel! I always love that song. I guess Oasis fans around the world would make this their anthem. 'Oasis fans of the world unite, you have nothing to lose but Oasis!'

Yet another thing about Jason is that he is so secretive. All this while we have been going out in a group, we have so much fun and laughter, most of the jokes came from dear Sebastian. He can really make you laugh just by sitting there and not moving. Jason has two secrets he won't let out. One, which someone eventually found out, is that he is playing with another group 'The Yellow Porcupines' (a punk band influenced by 'The Ramones', 'The Sex Pistols', 'The Dead Kennedys', 'The Exploited' and 'MC5').

We suspected something fishy as he came in one day with a spiky haircut and a safety pin through the left side of his nose. When we found out, there is a big argument between him and the leader, Sebastian. Sebastian says its okay, Jason can stay in the band as long he comes in whenever he is needed. I really pity Sebastian, he says that mainly because he is really desperate. The band cannot exist without a lead guitarist. And one says the dummest thing when one is desperate. Like so many people remain in the same job even though  they are underpaid.

The most frightening thing about Jason is his other secret. One day I am by myself, Jason comes by to tell me that he is crazy over me. He says that ever since he met me, he cannot keep his mind off me. He wants me to be his special. I am so surprised by that, I just don't know what to tell him. All this time, when we are with the group, Jason never shows any liking  towards me and now he says he adores me. I am confused.

The only thing I can tell Jason is that I am not ready for any relationship of that kind. If he wants to, he can treat me like a kid sister, then I am not afraid to follow him anywhere. At least that would give me some time to think things over and get to know him better.

Soon Jason starts dating me. I follow him along like he's my big brother. Each time I come home from our date, I get a feeling that Jason is not satisfied with me being his sister. He wants something more, he wants assurance, he wants possession!  One time I don't know if its a joke, he passes me a note where he has written 'Sometimes we may quarrel, other times we laugh. Whatever happens, as lovers we will last. I am always your hubby and you my wife.' He signs on it and asks me to do too. I refuse. From then on I try to keep my distance.

Jason begins to be jealous of Sebastian and tells me not to believe him too much. One day Sebastian comes in and says he kind of like Bob Marley. Lately, he has bought a Dvd 'Bob Marley Live at the Rainbow' and he intends to show it to the group. He tells Jason to listen to 'Trenchtown Rock'. Jason shouted ' Why the hell should we listen to you. We don't play raggae, you can keep that load of rubbish to yourself!' Sebastian keeps quiet.

I figure out that Jason starts hating me ever since I refuse to sign his note. One day, he walks in with a girl, hand in hand. He introduces his girlfriend to the group, including me. A week later, this girl comes and tell me she hates me. She says Jason talks about me all the time. She thinks he loves me and not her. I am getting even more confused.

Jason jealousy grows worse each time he sees me talking with Sebastian. He always thinks that Sebastian is up to no good. He says Sebastian is trying to get me into bed with his music knowledge. I hate him for saying that. Sebastian has always been a gentleman to me and he will always be.